#36: (Something clever about losing stuff)

Believe it or not, I am taking a fairly different approach to the current work load of preparing for Hot Pursuit’s relaunch than I did for the initial launch. This new approach will even affect my blog. And it all started a couple of weeks after Hot Pursuit’s project ended.

So, let’s jump back to the middle of March. The clock continued to tick but my total funding… not so much. I was surprisingly not devastated when it died. Afterall, this was my first project and the tiny game made balancing the number of backers at reasonable backer levels against the total shipping and printing costs difficult. Well, at the end of the project I suddenly found myself with some “extra” time to think and do stuff. During this opportunity to catch my breath, I reviewed old blog posts and looked through my idea notebooks as I contemplated participating in a new design contest. That is when I found my old friend, A Dragon Show for the King.

When I last left ADSftK, I was charting and reworking all of the figures and some of the abilities in order to give players a fighting chance of actually finishing the game. Well, my friend Craig was showing off his new game idea, but I wanted to play my game, too. As I sat down to update my prototype, my blood was pumping; my mind was racing with ideas (in a good way); I was looking forward to the busy-work… heck, joy was returning to my life. It turns out, though, I had already worked out all of the new math and redid most of the cards (up to 4 players worth) back in February of 2015. Which means that I had not touched this game (which I was genuinely excited to publish someday) for over a year.

THAT is where I found the problem. THAT is when I found this thing that I didn’t even know I had lost: joy.

The reason I’ve been designing for 3 years despite basically no public/professional attention is because I get a great sense of fulfillment in the work. However, for nearly a year, preparing Hot Pursuit for Kickstarter is all I allowed myself to think about. For 3 months, ALL of my free-time was dedicated to Hot Pursuit and it’s Kickstarter (the page, the print / ship quotes, the rules, the convention, etc.). For quite some time there, if I wasn’t working, sleeping, or eating, I was working on Hot Pursuit. The work didn’t bother me because I deemed it necessary. I am dedicated to getting this business off the ground. If Jamey Stegmaier and Colby Dauch can do it, so can I!

Unfortunately, in that race to launch I managed to get too busy; too focused; too “productive”. I was honestly starting to feel the pangs of doubt, frustration, and futility – until I returned to game design. All of a sudden, the future looked bright! I had hope again. My insurmountable, soul-crushing problems were gone.

So, now I have a new plan. Instead of doing EVERYTHING I POSSIBLY CAN TO LAUNCH ASAP (!!!), I am going to work responsibly and not launch until I am completely ready. More importantly, I am going to continue designing on the side. This will actually give me an opportunity to try something I’ve wanted to do for over a year. Very soon, I’ll begin a “Design Diary” segment where I share with you my thought process of working through a game from day one.

While I am stoked to finally give the design diary a try, there is a catch. You see, as a backer, I hate getting project updates which talk about the designer’s next game. When I am counting the days waiting for your current game to arrive, talking about the next project just sounds like you begging for more money and I hate it. Therefore, my Kickstarter projects will not ever refer to other designs I am working on. I will only be discussing the new games HERE, and only if I also have a Lessons Learned post for the same week. I don’t want to “brag” at you when you are likely coming here for those “lessons”.

Anywho, that’s it for now. Have you ever lost something important without realizing it? Ever get too involved in a big project? Tell me about it 😀

Let me know what you think